39 Weeks Labor And Life Stalled

I haven’t written a blog post in weeks now because mentally and physically this pregnancy just exhausted me. I’ve wanted to blog but the topics and words just couldn’t couldn’t appear for me. I’m 39 weeks pregnant and no one, including my doctors, thought I would make it this far into my pregnancy.

Yes, I should be happy and ecstatic that I officially went full term with Evelynne but it has come at a price. At 34 weeks, I was 1 cm dilated and at 35 weeks, I progressed to 2cm dilated. The contractions were coming on stronger by the day. This meant the baby should be coming any day right? I’ve been sitting, not so pretty, at 2cm with strong contractions for about a month now.

Also, for over a month now, I’ve been back to getting sick every time I eat which leaves me with no energy at all. I have tried every trick I could find or someone suggested to get my labor started again but nothing has worked.

Everyone keeps asking when she is going to be here but I have no idea. The doctors are content with letting me go until 41/42 weeks but I need my body back. Don’t get me wrong, I love my baby girl and want her to be healthy but I question how healthy she can be when I can’t eat and hold anything down? My doctors don’t seem to be concerned when I questioned them about it.

Another crazy thing was when I asked about being induced this past Tuesday (38 weeks 3 days), the nurse practitioner told me that they would need to do an amniocentesis to check her lung maturity…. what the actual *^%#?? I’ve never heard that and just watch over 50 women in my baby mama group give birth early, some being induced and not one of them had this occur or suggested! Now I’m just frustrated as h^**!

I know she will get here on her own schedule but I would just like to eat again… and not get sick!

Add the baby stress to the holiday stress and life stress and I am a mess. I will have a new post about my 2018 goals on January so please tune back in!

34 Weeks and on Strict Bed Rest

Tips to be Impeccably Groomed

The past week has been an eventful week between getting a cold, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving/Black Friday shopping and my OB appointment. Thankfully, my mom does the cooking for Thanksgiving so there wasn’t much I needed to do besides help her.

We had our Thanksgiving night shopping planned out but most of the big items, I ended up waiting until the sales went live to order them online so all we needed to get were the small things. We love Black Friday shopping to stock up on winter pajamas and household items. This year I made sure to get a new bath mat since Max began to eat ours up (memory foam yummy!) and towels with wash clothes that match. I even picked up a new bathrobe to pack in my hospital bag for the baby for only $10!

Problem with being in my third trimester and Black Friday is that I could barely walk around by the time we were done with each store. Surprisingly, Walmart was the store that had the least stress but Target had the rudest people who I just wanted to ram with a shopping cart. Our family tradition was to get disco fries (fries smothered with cheese and gravy) from our local diner but they were closed this year along with every other fast food place except McDonalds. So we got our fries but they were smothered with salt and ketchup. Then it was off to bed for me which was about 10 pm.

Through the day, before we started shopping I really wasn’t feeling well and had on and off contractions but the sleep seemed to help ease them. Since it was Black Friday, Doug had to work at 5am so I had to go to my OB appointment by myself. I figured it was going to by the typical tell the OB what was going on the past 2 weeks, he would check my cervix and I would be on my way. In and out in 15 minutes….

Well that wasn’t the case. We went over my contractions and other symptoms so he decided to do a FFN culture and some other tests that I am not sure about to check whether my body could possibly go into labor in the next 2 weeks. I am measuring about 3 weeks ahead of schedule which could mean that little miss is gaining lots of weight and could be bigger then a watermelon at full-term. (My girl parts are hurting thinking about it).

Then, he decided to run a non stress test for the baby which monitors how the baby’s heart reacts to her movements and my contractions. The nurse kept saying she as doing well especially with my strong contractions but the doctor wanted further reassurance and sent me to another location for an ultrasound. I love getting to see my baby girl with ultrasounds but scary to see her in position to be born. She is head down, face towards my back and low. Everything else including her breathing looked good and the tech sent me on my way. 3 hours later and I was heading home!

The doctor told be he would call me with my FFN results that night and to stay on strict bed rest, meaning staying in bed unless I need to go to the bathroom or get a drink, until I heard from him. As long as I was awake, the contractions were continuing and were intense but when I would fall asleep I would barely feel them. This could mean my body needs the relaxation or that I can handle the pain while I slept which is how I dealt with most of my labor with Danyella. The doctor never called and the lab haven’t posted my results on my account so I am hoping that this is good news.

Since I have been up the past couple of hours (currently 6am EST), I have had some contractions that were intense so I will be continuing my bed rest and hoping I get my results sometime today since our blood lab works 7 days a week. Now to deal with the boredom, oh wait I have homework to do and crochet orders to work on…. never any boredom time in my life! On a bright note, I am bingeing on Hallmark Christmas movies while I am in bed.

 

32 Weeks and a New OB

Connection

So I will be honest I have no idea what a pomelo is so I had to google it… It is a large fruit similar to grapefruit. It was originally native to Caribbean countries like Barbados and Jamaica but is now grown in other warm climates like Hawaii and Florida. So basically my baby is a very large grapefruit.

Well we hit the next big milestone… 32 weeks! Now that I have met with the new OB’s office and can now deliver at the closer hospital because they only deliver from 32 weeks on at that location. I can’t even express how happy I am that I changed OB offices though we are still having issues with the insurance company updating the new plan in the system. This office made me feel at ease as soon as I met with my new nurse liaison. I never even knew these existed for OB patients but she is my go to person if anything happens or I need to ask a question during office hours instead of getting a different person every time I call in. This is biggest thing that makes me feel at ease with my choice.

The network provides a baby book that basically answers every question through pregnancy and the first year of the baby’s life. Plus they have their own app for kick counts, contractions and pregnancy questions.

Then I met with the nurse practitioner that went over my entire history and we made our game plan for the rest of the pregnancy which basically is to keep this baby girl in as long as possible. I am continuing every other week with the OB right now since I see the MFM every week for my shot and vitals.

As scary as switching OB’s offices late in my pregnancy was to think about and trust me my husband dealt with a lot of my sleepless nights and panic attacks, it was absolutely the right decision. Anyone who has doubts about the care they are receiving whether pregnant or not, switch to a doctor that will put your needs and concerns first and don’t be scared to speak up. You are your best advocate for yourself, your body and your mind. 3rd

29 Weeks Pregnant and the Hormonal Imbalance

29 weeks

 

If you have ever been pregnant or been around a pregnant woman when they watch a happy or sad movie, when they feel stressed out or when they are just sitting there and nothing is actually happening? You know that they can be happy one minute, go into a psychcoatic rage the next minute and end up in tears by the end of the moment.

I can’t remember being so hormonal with the other pregnancies but with this pregnancy, I have been off the chart with these hormones. Since the beginning  of this pregnancy, I have been crying at everything or going into a rage and yelling at everyone. I am not one that cries in front of anyone unless it is a huge thing. I don’t cry at funerals or other sad moments. This pregnancy, I cry at everything!

A couple of weeks ago, I started to hysterically cry and Doug just couldn’t understand why I was crying. So between breathes, I tried to explain that I was crying because the puppy was getting more of his attention then I was. All he could do was laugh which just made my crying even worse. I mean really, I was crying over being jealous of the puppy, I am going freaking crazy!

Then there are the movies and tv shows that make me cry… I love to watch my romantic movies but I have been craving the romance, almost like I was forcing myself to cry. Even my tv show choices have had me in tears! I watch my normal shows like NCIS and Hell’s Kitchen but Grey’s Anatomy and This Is Us has triggered tears just a few shows into the season. There is a new show, The Good Doctor, about an Autistic doctor learning how to communicate with his co-workers and patients. Every single episode has had me in tears!

Now, add all my tears to the crazy dreams that send me into rages when I wake up in the morning and it is surpsise that Doug is still alive. The other morning, I woke after another one of those dreams that he was cheating on me with some skinny, pretty girl, and just started hitting him with my pillow. All he could do was turn around with a smirk and ask if I had “one of those stupid dreams again?”! No, I was just wanting to hit you becuase I had a happy dream. In my baby mama group, this has been a repeating topic of discussion about the crazy cheating dreams we have been having even though we know they are not real or going to really happen. Crazy, Crazy Hormones!

Currently, I am torturing myself by watching Call the Midwife for the third time! How can I watch babies be born and not cry? I can’t so bring on the box of tissues while I survive the last 11 weeks of this pregnancy. Also, wish my friends and family luck while they deal with temporary hormonal insanity!

**Weekly Update: We had a growth check on Wednesday and Evelynne is looking great. She stuck her tongue out which made a cute picture. She is weighing in at almost 3 pounds and growing right on track. Everything is keeping closed like I need them to so we have graduated from the bi-weekly ultrasounds which is kinda sad because I loved seeing her so often but she lets herself be known by moving all day and night.

Photo Oct 18, 2 02 18 PM

Turning 28 Weeks during Pregnancy and Infant Loss Month

Girl Meets Grill presents

Today, I turn 28 weeks and am officially in the Third Trimester but tomorrow is a somber day because it is October 15th, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. It is somber because I am one those women that have lost a baby that I never got to meet. I am 1 in 4.

It is so hard to really wrap my head around the fact that I am a statistic but I have had miscarriages in my first trimester and one in my second trimester. That moment when you just know something is wrong and the doctor confirms, the baby is no longer viable (able to continue to grow), is the one of the worst moments a woman can go through no matter if it is your first miscarriage or 4th.

My body is the type that responds to pregnancy almost immediately so I feel those symptoms very early. So when I have lost those babies, it was like losing a piece of my heart, especially with the 2nd trimester loss. That one, I went through morning sickness and cravings. I went for my routine ultrasound but when the tech became very quiet and went to get the doctor, I knew it was over. There was no heartbeat. I fell into a depression after that miscarriage which took a long time to recover from.

In January, I went through my last miscarriage which was not any easier but we agreed to try for another one. We tried for a couple of months but stress and life made doing the deed to make a baby less and less frequent so when I realized I was pregnant again we were both shocked but so happy. I still analyze every time I go to the bathroom that something could be wrong but everything with the baby has been great. We are now in our third trimester!

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27 Weeks and Low Blood Pressure

27 Weeks

It is my last week in my 2nd trimester and I finally beginning to understand why I have been feeling like well crap. For weeks, I have been told that my blood pressure was just way to low, and I needed to work on making it higher. For pregnant women, you usually hear a doctor be concerned about high blood pressure but there are the rare few that suffer from just the opposite, low blood pressure.

At the Maternal Fetal Medicine office, they have been checking my blood pressure every week when I get my shot. This is where the concern for the continued drop in blood pressure has been voiced the most. Their suggest was to drink a Gatorade everyday to help with my sodium and electrolyte intake which should help my blood pressure rise. The other day, I went to see my regular (delivering) OB and the nurse was concerned that my blood pressure was high. When I asked the numbers, she said it was 121/68 which was high compared to my previous visits. My response was that the Gatorade must be working!

I will admit, it has been extremely difficult for me to drink Gatorade, Powerade or any other ade with electrolytes because I don’t like the after taste and it gives me heartburn. I found a Gatorade called Flow Smooth in 2 different flavors and not only do I like the flavors but there hasn’t been any side effects either! WIN WIN

My OB explained that the low blood pressure was, more than likely, the cause of how uncomfortable and crappy I have been feeling every single day. Low blood pressure has accounted for my dizzy and light headed spells that I frequently have had, some days multiple times a day. I chalked up my shortness in breath to the baby pushing into my ribs and growing bigger but the lower blood pressure actually contributed to my breathing issues. Plus, I can tell it is low when I begin to see spots in my vision. Lastly, it was explained that some of my headaches and general weakness is more than likely from the low blood pressure.

Now that I have been drinking a Gatorade a day, I can definitely feel a difference. The spots and headaches are not as frequent. I still feel pretty weak and dizzy at moments but its been my cue to drink some Gatorade and then I start to feel better or I end up taking a nap. OH a nap sounds so good right now! Ok I am off to take a nap before I have to write a paper tonight.

nap

Half Way Done, So Why Am I Not Happier?

Half way done with my pregnancy and I should be doing the “Happy Dance” but I physically cannot because the pain in my back makes it hard for me to even walk let alone dance. Add to that, I woke up this morning with my feet so swollen that it hurts to put any pressure on them. The list could go on….

 

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I made the joke to my OB nurse/friend the other day when she asked me how I was doing: ” Eh, miserable like usual. I feel like I am experiencing every single negative pregnancy symptom with this baby”. Well, of course, since I put it out to the universe, the universe answered by giving me new symptoms to deal with and now I would be willing to deal with just the old symptoms like the heartburn, constipation and hemorrhoids. (Yes I know TMI but what do you think pregnancy and giving birth is… putting your whole body out there for people to touch, prod and poke so why hold back on what looks like just a cute baby bump everyone wants to touch.)

Now in my reality, my half way mark could have come and pass because of my history of preemies but I would like to keep Baby Evelynne inside her little incubator for at least another few months for her own good. I just wish these symptoms would let up just a little bit or at least have just one at a time. (lol the small things that you begin to appreciate)

In my baby group, another mom expressed the same thing of how she is just miserable in her pregnancy. No Glow, No Happy Moments just symptoms that make your survival through each day a challenge. For any other moms going through the symptoms of pregnancy, you are never alone! There is always other moms going through the same symptoms and feelings!

Something to look forward to is the big anatomy ultrasound on Wednesday (I know, I know we already know the sex but still getting to see how big she is compared to making sure my cervix is “nice and long will be a nice change). I know that I am supposed to count up with the weeks like next week will be 21 weeks, but I will be going the other way… next week is 19 weeks to go!